Imagine the inner monologue of a new student who has landed on the college campus of their dreams: Are they thinking about how lucky they are to have found the right fit and are eager to learn, stretch, and grow? Or are they thinking about how they are not worthy to be there. That it may have been a fluke. And even if they were successful in high school, how will they know if they are going to be successful in this place?
Chances are good that most students are thinking about not fitting in, not being successful, and not feeling comfortable because they feel like a fraud and at any moment they will be “found out” and asked to leave. This is called “imposter syndrome,” and while it may seem extreme, it is well documented in many contexts, especially in college.
Simply put, imposter syndrome is the belief that you are not worthy or qualified to be in a certain position or place. Feeling this way is normal (many of us feel this way in a new setting), but it can wreak havoc on one’s confidence if someone experiences it over a long period of time.
What does imposter syndrome look like in a college setting?
- Not participating in class discussions.
- Not preparing for class or completing assignments.
- Completing assignments, but not submitting them.
- Discounting beliefs, ideas, and quality of work.
- Avoiding difficult situations or challenging courses and environments.
- Avoiding asking for help.
What are the effects of students who suffer from imposter syndrome?
- Demotivation to stay in courses or in college.
- Stress that can affect other areas of their lives.
- Feelings of incompetence and fear.
- In extreme cases, failure of assignments or courses and dropping out.
While there may be other reasons that students stumble or crumble when faced with hardships, it is important for families to be aware that one of the underlying reasons may be because their student feels like a fraud and doesn’t want to be exposed for not knowing or being prepared.
This is where it is critical to have ongoing conversations with your student, checking in to see how they are doing and why they think they are doing well (or not). Nonetheless, there are specific strategies that can you use to help lessen the feelings of imposter syndrome and their effects:
- Share your own stories of feeling out of place or unprepared for a situation, role, or position. Share how you felt and how you got through it.
- Encourage your student to ask for help. Mentors, advisors, tutors, and professors expect (and want!) students to ask them questions and to get help when they are stuck, worried, or afraid to take the next step.
- Model asking questions or having difficult conversations. Consider doing a role play with your student so they can prepare articulating what they can say.
- Share what you have learned about imposter syndrome. Remind them that they belong where they are. The university welcomed them to become part of the campus and they believe they can succeed.
Check out my latest video on imposter syndrome and subscribe to the Higher Ed Parent YouTube channel.
